I have attempted blogging in the past but they were rather feeble attempts. They were soon abandoned. While I am not sure this time will be much different, I am going to try again. I have had a bit of a year and I thought it would be therapeutic to write a blog.

A little introduction first. My name is Elaine and I am 51 years old, not a spring chicken but my mind hasn't got the message. I live in North London with my husband, four sons and our dog, Hamish. I like gardening although, I have neglected the garden for quite a while but hope to get back on track.  I also love yoga and have been practising Mindfulness for over 18 months. I love reading but have had attention span issues which makes reading challenging.

Life was and still is busy. Our house is hectic and verging on chaotic at times. I am rather erratic on the housework front. It is not easy on a house full of males. Sometimes, even I need a break from my nagging voice. It's easier to step over the trainers in the hall than constantly negotiating their removal. My boys are of the 'manana, manana' persuasion. 

Last year I was diagnosed with breast cancer. First mammogram and lucky me, I got the booby prize! It was a small tumour but very treatable according to my consultant. For the next few months I went developed tunnel vision, the only thing to concentrate on was get   treatment. No mastectomy or chemotherapy was required. I had a wide local excision and removal of the tumour, 15 sessions of radio therapy and I am on Tamoxifen for 5 years. Looking at it written down it looks fairly straightforward and I am grateful that it was caught early and very relieved I was not offered chemotherapy. But looking back I realise that despite constantly reminding myself how lucky I was, I didn't feel that lucky. 

I had good mechanisms in place with my yoga and meditation. The mindfulness came into it's when I was having all the tests pre-surgery.I even managed to meditate when I had an MRI which was no mean feat. A bit noisy doesn't cover it, it was noisy on an industrial level but I managed to focus on a nature scene and stay still. 

Anyway, I am a year on and cancer free and now seems a good time to share the things I have learned about cancer and myself. Whether there will be anyone to share it with is another matter.